Director: Peter Berg
Starring: Will Smith, Jason Bateman, Charlize Theron
Tagline: "He is saving the world whether we like it or not."
Random Trivia:Vince Gilligan, who wrote the second draft of the script - which had been floating around for a decade before Sony finally picked it up - was credited as a writer on over two dozen episodes of The X-Files, and also gained producer credits later in the series.
What can I say about Hancock... oh, I'm the fucking reviewer. That's right. A lot.
I was lightly baked - buzzed by the end - for this. I thought I'd throw that in for no reason other than this: I find that being high doesn't really make a bad movie enjoyable, or a good movie dull. The high simply enhances a good movie - and makes the flaws of a bad one all the more obvious.
Hancock is a movie that doesn't know where its going. Much like Will Smith's Hancock himself, it doesn't know what its purpose is, isn't sure of itself, and is, for the most part, wasted potential.
The basics: John Hancock, known simply as Hancock, is a superhero. Just not a very good one. He causes more harm than good. The public hates him. He's an alcoholic. And then one day, as much by happenstance as by skill, he saves Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman), a P.R. guy who decides to return the favor - by giving Hancock an image makeover.
It's a great concept. A destructive superhero. A fuckup. A guy who can't stop a freeway chase without causing 9$ million in damages. Of course, Smith is already familiar with expensive freeway chases, having been part of Bad Boys 2. And there's problem number one: Smith gives it his all - but he really can't pull off gruff. His fake-ass neat beard that was supposed to look unkempt annoyed the fuck out of me. Was the fucking thing drawn on?
Despite that, problem number two is the bigger issue here: Hancock should have been an awesome dark comedy, but it seems those in charge didn't have the balls to go all the way. Halfway through we start leaning towards a family-friendly outing. Sure, the word asshole is thrown around a lot, but we've got the cute kid, the bonding moments, the whole "do the right thing and good things will happen" story line.
And we get lame shit like Hancock asking someone if it's ok to save them...
Let me tell you about my vision of Hancock: Hancock is a fuck-up. He's a guy with super powers, who just doesn't give a shit. He does the bare minimum for a guy with his talents - he saves people, because that's his role, and he doesn't know what else to do with his time - other than drink. He uses the word fuck. He shows up with tramps at seedy motels. He tries, in vain, to figure out just what the fuck he is and where he fits in. He causes all sorts of chaos when he does try to "help" - and he doesn't stick around to defend himself. If a couple bystanders get hurt due to his efforts, he doesn't give a shit. He's got tunnel vision.
That sort of Hancock would have been interesting, but its as if the writers/director got half way there - and then pussied out.
Instead, we get a luke-warm tale of redemption with one of the most idiotically contrived plots I've seen in ages. Hancock believes he's the only one of his kind, immortal, and unstoppable - but he has a weakness. I won't spoil it, but keep an eye out for lingering close-ups from Hancock's perspective.
The movie has its moments - YouTube holding a collection of Hancock's failures, Charlize Theron being smoking hot as Embrey's wife Mary, and a whale toss (spoiled by many a commercial) - but then there's Hancock shoving a guy's head up another guy's ass, done off-screen and fully clothed to ensure a safe rating. And instead of the awesomely dark character study/black comedy that could have been, we get a cheerful Will Smith vehicle that just exists, for no real reason other than that it wouldn't be summer without a Will Smith blockbuster. Actually, is there even one this year?
Overall rating: 1/4 Baked (2 out of 5)
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